The Giant Disconnect
I am tired of the disconnect.
I am tired. Tired of the disconnect between reality and the expectation of society, companies, corporations and governments to carry on with business as usual. There are people dying all over the world – Palestine, Sudan, Congo, Iran, and the US to name a few – and no one bats an eye. Economic instability and inequality are rampant. Human rights are being stripped away in so many countries – especially in those espousing Democratic ideals.
Personally, Black fatigue is real. I’m so tired of hearing about Black people showing up dead under mysterious circumstances – but inconceivably ruled as suicides. Tired of the blatant racism, the micro-aggressions, the gaslighting, the co-opting of Black culture (both American and throughout the African diaspora). Tired of seeing Black people having their joy being interrupted and despised by racist people. I’m tired of white creators trying to explain white supremacy and the patriarchy to Black people as if we don’t have to live through its effects every day, every minute. Tired of getting only a sigh of relief in between more news of the crazy. When will the normalisation of denigrating, exploiting, and dehumanising black people by many races/ethnicities end?
Whenever a Black person decides to understandably complain on a public platform, someone inevitably has to comment one of the following phrases: 1) “Why are you playing the race card?”; 2) “Why are you bringing up stuff from the past, that was so long ago?”; 3) “Instead of complaining, do the work like the rest of us” (like we don’t already work hard if not harder); 4) “We (fill in whatever ethnicity/gender, etc…) have it hard too”; 5) “What about Black on Black crime?” (interchangeable with “There aren’t enough Black fathers in the home”). Then there’s always some flat-out racist statement – usually more than one.
When all of the stuff with ICE in the States started ramping up and white people ended up being killed by them and Black creators were seemingly quiet, white creators were asking why they weren’t speaking up and out as if Black activists haven’t been pointing out the dangers of a police state and governmental overreach for decades already. Tired. The anger is there but the tiredness is more palpable.
To some extent, the need for escapism is real. To be able to find some respite in between news cycles (and I don’t even watch the news), social media, and just daily conversations is a blessing. Now, is the time to seek out your support systems, if you have them. Now is also the time you’ll see just how strong your support systems really are when you need them most. This is a time of reckoning, in ourselves to see what we are made of and what we truly believe in. What will we not stand for anymore in our lives and in the outside world? What do the people in our lives stand for and are we still aligned in our thinking? Will our bonds grow stronger with those in our lives? Will we have to let some relationships go for the sake of our sanity and personal/spiritual growth?
There’s a lot going on right now. A lot of clearing on a personal/individual level and in our outside world but it is all leading up to good growth and a world worth living in. The trajectory we’ve been on is just not sustainable. In the midst of the chaos, let’s try to seek out glimmers and seeds of hope and love and joy. Thankfully, those are also being spread. Those moments, experiences, stories of happiness, joy and miracles can help sustain us through the hard times. I try to think of what my ancestors went through and use that to give me strength as well. If they could create such lasting achievements (so many inventions and resistance movements that have studied and adopted by other countries) and beauty (like art, music and literature) while being so oppressed, the least I can do is try to thrive in my own way. I’m also taking comfort in the little things everywhere I find them. Anything from listening to the birds in the morning to loving moments with my family to K-dramas/comedies to music to funny IG reels. Now is the time to lean on your good friends and your spiritual practice. Find anything that lights you up. And REST! Rest is something that can be easily overlooked. I still find it hard to rest after all of these years of being told to stay productive at all times. There’s an inexplicable guilt that seems to pop up every time. I’m learning to quash it though, so yay me!
Take care of yourselves! We will get through this. This too shall pass.
