Surrender

What does surrender mean to you?

Surrender has had different meanings for me over the years. When I was younger, surrender meant giving up or losing to someone or something. I didn’t like the word or my concept of it. I was going to push through whatever obstacle. I was going to fight for what was mine. Surrender was something I resisted because I didn’t like any loss of control. Uncertainty was something to avoid at all costs. Always having a Plan B, D, E and Z was a source of comfort to me.

Presently, surrender can have different meanings depending on what’s taking place in my life at the time. Surrender can mean choosing to let something go – the battle isn’t worth it. Surrender can look like letting go of anyone or anything that no longer serves my highest and greatest good. Fear, pain, doubt, anger, sorrow and insecurities to name a few. Yes, all of these will still come up because I am a human Be-ing but I can choose how long I will take to move through those feelings/thoughts.

Surrender can also mean relinquishing the illusion of control over uncertainty. I now allow space for Divine Intelligence/Universe to guide me to the right place and time for whatever and whoever I am supposed to be at that moment. Part of the resistance to uncertainty was the fear of failure. Failure, in the past, felt like a personal deficiency. Now, I try to stay in beginner’s mind and stay in a state of constant learning and growing. Some days it’s easy, other days I’m paralysed in a state of anxiety.

Surrender means surrendering to joy – allowing myself the freedom, openness and expansion joy brings. In the past, joy was something I feared because I felt something or someone would come along and take my joy away at any given moment and the bleakness of life would catch up with me. One day, this surrender to joy will become second nature to me but right now it is a conscious choice to stay present, feel the joy and just be happy. I’m also learning about what truly brings me lasting joy so I can embrace more of that in my life.

By surrendering to Divine Intelligence/Universe, I allow magic in. I allow miracles in. I allow in reliable and sustainable support in whatever form it takes – my Spirit Team, Higher Self or people the Universe brings into my life for a short time or a long time (soul family or kindred spirits). I give Divine Intelligence the time and space to do its thing, remembering that in many situations, I am not the only variable involved. There’s a phrase that floats around a lot in spiritual communities – “waiting for Divine Timing” – that sometimes drives me crazy. In hindsight, I find that the wait was necessary for situations to fall in line with the best scenario. Whenever I jumped the gun a little, I either hit a bump or a wall or the scenario ended up being kinda close to what I wanted but not the most ideal.

Patience is the way. I have moments of resistance but I’ve progressed much further than I have before so I’ll take the win. This wonderful life is a journey not a race so I’m taking small steps daily. As long as I am moving forward, I’m on the right path. Hopefully in sharing this, you will take some time to think about what surrender means to you and what it looks like in your life.

Journal Prompt:
What’s one small step you can take today or that you’ve already taken recently, that demonstrates surrender in your life?